


Butterflies And Hurricanes- 2.0

by bangles25



Category: SHINee
Genre: Child Abuse, Consensual Sex, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Explicit Language, Homophobic Language, Human Experimentation, Kidnapping, M/M, Misgendering, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Physical Abuse, Self-Harm, Sexual Assault, Sexual Harassment, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Torture, Victim Blaming
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-02-19 03:48:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22838029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bangles25/pseuds/bangles25
Summary: Children being taken from their homes and people being pulled off the streets are a common occurrence in South Korea. But no one knows that the government is the one behind these missing people. The people taken are sent to a highly guarded, secret facility, where they are used as human lab rats. From the moment they step into the building, their lives are never the same.(REPOSTED-check note)
Relationships: Choi Minho/Kim Kibum | Key, Kim Jonghyun/Kim Kibum | Key, Kim Kibum | Key/Lee Taemin, Kim Kibum | Key/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 22





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> ok, i dont write much anymore, but this fic is my baby, ive been working on it for years, and i really wanna finish it. some of you probably read the original. i was rereading it though and really unhappy with some parts, so i decided i should repost it instead of just editing the original. wont be a lot of huge changes, just a lot of little things.i dont have a posting schedule planned but i'll try to keep them no more than a month apart.
> 
> if you havent read this story before, please take the warnings seriously. i dont really hold back much in this story. and i dont mention whats gonna happen when because i like to keep stuff a surprise if i can so please take care of yourself first.

**ONE**

  
Kibum rolled over in his bed and sighed. The silence of his dark room felt so loud he thought he would go crazy. It was the third night in a row he’d been unable to sleep. He squeezed his eyes tighter and prayed to any God that would listen to let him sleep. He didn’t want to have those bitter yellow pills forced down his throat again. Not like last night. He couldn’t go through it again.

He shuddered and dug his fingers into his arm, fighting back tears as the previous night replayed in his head. He could still feel those hands on him, stroking and feeling him, pulling his thighs apart. Fingers pushing into him. The sound of a zipper echoed through his head and he flinched, the sound so real in his ears that for a moment he thought it was happening again. Those yellow fucking pills, they made him so tired and weak. Helpless.

On top of that, the doctor’s words continued to bounce around his head. _"J_ _ust a couple more days Kibum. Wednesday, the first of the new month.”_ Dr. Cho’s grin was vivid in Kibum’s head. _“Wednesday we finally get to start. I’ve waited 14 years for this day. You should be excited Kibum, you’ll be famous_.”

No one would tell him why.

He rubbed his hands over his face and groaned, turning onto his side and pulling the blanket over his head. He pushed himself into the corner of the bed, his pillows shoved against the wall.

Suddenly light flooded his room, sneaking through his thin blanket to blind him further. “Kibum, wake up.”

It was Dr. Cho. Kibum slowly sat up, fear coursing through him, and climbed out of his bed, squinting to try to block out the light. “What’s going on?” Kibum asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Had he come to force more pills down his throat? Hold him down and rip his pajama bottoms off? 

“We messed up, we thought we had another room, but someone fucked up. They’re gonna pay for it don’t worry,” he laughed darkly, “Congratulations you’re going to have a roommate from now on.” It was then Kibum noticed the blonde boy behind the doctor. He was small and thin, probably no more than 16 or 17 years old. “This is Taemin.” The doctor stepped back and shoved Taemin further into the room. “Share your bed with him.”

Kibum nodded and bowed. “Yes sir.”

Dr. Cho nodded and turned to leave. He tapped some buttons on the keypad next to the door and it slid open. Dr. Cho left, the door quickly sliding shut behind him, followed by the electronic beeping that signaled the door was locked. 

Kibum stood awkwardly in front of the newcomer, picking at his arm, keeping his eyes focused on the floor, only sneaking sporadic peeks at Taemin. He knew Taemin was different from him; he’d lived a different life than Kibum had. Up until now, Taemin had lived a normal life, with his mom and dad. He’d gone to school and had friends; played sports and video games- things Kibum only knew about through books, television and the stories he’d been told. On the rare occasions he was able to interact with other people, he’d been told a handful by others of what was outside the walls that had encased him for almost his whole life and he knew the boy in front of him had been lucky enough to experience those things.

He was jealous of Taemin. He’d gotten to grow up normally and wasn’t broken the way Kibum was. He would be able to picture his parents perfectly in his head. The memories of Kibum’s parents were nothing more than the swish of a pale blue skirt and the sound of the latches on his father’s briefcase, which he held onto desperately, fearfully wondering everyday of his life if he was fading from their minds the way they were from his.

“Hey!” 

Taemin’s words broke Kibum from his thoughts. He jerked his head up to see Taemin had taken a step towards him, and he hesitantly stepped back. “Do you know what the fuck this place is? What’s going on?”

“You just got here?”

Taemin nodded. “Yeah, what is this place?”

Kibum finally noticed the tremors in his voice. He felt bad for him, he had no idea what he was in for. “It’s your new home.”

“What do you mean?”

Kibum shuffled back to his bed, motioning for Taemin to follow. As he remade his bed to make room for the new boy, he spoke. “Whatever life you had before you got here-just forget it, because that’ll never be your life again. You belong to them now.”

Taemin snorted. “I don’t belong to anyone.” He was so confident, so naïve. 

Kibum turned to look at him solemnly. “Yes you do, just like I do. Just like all the others do.”

“What did we do to get sent here?” Taemin stared around the room, trying to hold back his fear.

Kibum shrugged and crawled into the bed. “Exist? I don’t know. I don’t think anyone but them knows….you should probably sleep.”

“You expect me to sleep after I’ve just been kidnapped!? I gotta get out of here, come on, help me.” The new boy snapped, his fingers balling into fists.

Kibum sighed and sat up, glancing at Taemin who still stood next to the kitchen table. “Nothing can be done. You need to rest, they might start right away.”

“Start what? What are you talking about?”

  
“Its like 3 o clock in the morning, I’m tired, I don’t feel like having this discussion right now, just go to sleep or you’ll regret it.”

“Are you threatening me?” Taemin tried to sound angry and tough but instead he just sounded scared.

“No, I’m giving you advice.”

Taemin picked at his thumbnail, absentmindedly, lifting his thumb to his mouth to chew on it. He stared at Kibum, the fear obvious on his face. “What are they gonna do to me?”

“Dunno.” Taemin hated how nonchalant the word sounded coming out of Kibum’s mouth. 

“Well what do they do to you?” Taemin asked, moving closer to the bed.

Kibum groaned. “You sure ask a lot of questions.” He inhaled deeply. “They took me when I was six. They took me for an experiment they haven’t even started yet. I think they needed me to grow up a certain way, I don’t-”

Taemin interrupted him. “Experiment?”

“That’s why they take us. We’re their lab rats.” He yawned, he was finally getting sleepy and the new kid was ruining it. “My whole life has been blood tests, nutrition tests, studies on my heart, my lungs…they’ve purposely exposed me to viruses…” Kibum trailed off, glancing up at Taemin to see shock painted across his features.

“Why didn’t you stop them?”

Kibum snorted. “I was too little. I was scared. And when I finally got big enough and brave enough…”

“What happened?” Taemin asked.

“It was three years ago-I was 17…they wanted to expose me to swine flu. I decided that I had to fight back, to defend myself. I’d wanted to for years, but I’d been too scared. But this was going to be the time I fought back. So I did. I fought. I yelled. I kicked and punched. I knocked the doctor unconscious and destroyed the lab trying to get out. I wrecked over eight hundred million won worth of supplies…so they sent me to the green room.”

“What’s that?”

“Go to sleep Taemin.”

“But-”

“Go to sleep!” He yelled, his voice cracking.

“Sorry,” Taemin whispered. He didn’t get a response. He glanced at the empty space on the mattress Kibum had made him and sighed, then glanced around the room. He decided to give the older boy his space, choosing instead to curl up in the recliner. After a few minutes the motion activated lights went off. He laid awake for an hour, wondering what the green room was, what kind of experiments happened there, what kind of experiments would happen to him, and if he would die, before he finally fell asleep.

  
A loud crash pulled Taemin out of his sleep. He slowly opened his eyes and looked around the room, sighing when he realized where he was. He pushed himself out of the chair, searching for the source of the noise.

Kibum was on the floor, sitting back on his hands, a kitchen chair turned on it's side nearby. Tears were streaking down his cheeks as he cowered below the man who loomed above him. It was the doctor from the other night, Cho Daehyun, and he glared down at Kibum. "You slut." He spit the words.

Kibum jerked back as if the words had knocked him in the chest. “im not,” he whispered.

Dr. Cho laughed. "You let Jungsu fuck you. You think I wouldn't find out?"

Kibum shook his head. He opened his mouth to speak but Dr. Cho spoke first. "You wanna go back to the green room?"

Kibum shook his head frantically. "No. no, no, no, no, no. It's not like that! He...he gave me the pills and I was so tired and weak and he held me down!" Fresh tears spilled down his cheeks, and they burned with shame.

"Jungsu raped you?"

The older boy nodded, sniffing loudly. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please don't punish me. Please, I'm so sorry."

Taemin stood silently, watching in shock as the boy on the floor _apologized_ for being raped. He was even more scared than he had been the night before. Was this going to be his life as well? What was the green room? Why was it so scary?

"Get up." Cho hissed, never taking his eyes off Kibum.

Kibum slowly stood up, keeping his eyes focused on the floor. Dr. Cho roughly grabbed his arm and led him towards the door. He looked over at Taemin and then nodded to the table. "Eat." He pulled Kibum out of the room, the door relocking behind him.

Taemin didn’t move at first, and instead stayed glued next to the recliner, staring at the spot where Kibum had slept. He felt so bad for him, and wondered what the crazy doctor was going to do to him, wondering if they would do it to him too. Sighing, he slowly walked over to the table to eat breakfast. 

He stared at the food for a long time, only taking small sips of milk. Just as he took his first bite of rice, the door opened. Kibum walked in, his eyes still trained at the floor. Dr Cho closed the door behind him and Taemin sighed at the already familiar 'click-click-beep' of the door locking.

"Are you okay-“ Taemin paused, realizing he didn’t know the older boy’s name. “-hyung?”

Kibum didn’t answer, he just stayed frozen in his spot, staring down at the floor, his shoulders shaking as he silently cried.

“Hyung?”

Kibum finally looked up, his tired eyes locking with Taemin's. He wondered if his eyes had ever been as pretty and bright as the blonde boy's, or if they'd always been dull, dim and ugly.

"What happened?" Taemin asked, not able to take his eyes off of Kibum's. He hadn't noticed it before. His left eye was a beautiful coffee brown...his right eye was cloudy, murky and unfocussed.

"He examined me." Kibum whispered, avoiding Taemin’s eyes.

"Because of what happened?"

Kibum hesitated, shame filling him, before nodding. "Yeah. And he gave me antibiotics. Then he said I wasn't brought here to be a cum receptacle, and once the experiment starts...if it happens, I'll be sent to the green room."

"But that's a punishment isn't it?" Taemin couldn't understand why Kibum would get punished for being assaulted-something completely out of his control.

Kibum nodded. "Can we talk about something else now? How old are you? What kind of stuff do you like? How was your breakfast? I made it, is it good?"

Taemin nodded. "Yes, thank you."

Kibum nodded and sat the small bottle of antibiotics on the counter before walking into the small living area, sitting down in the recliner. Taemin followed him into the area. Kibum was sitting in the only chair, so he sat down on the floor, crossing his legs underneath him. "I'm 18."

Kibum nodded. "What's it like?"

"Huh?"

"To be normal." Most of the people Kibum interacted with were older than him. The kids that were around his age had spent most of their lives in the same place he had. He rarely interacted with the other people in the facility to begin with, and this was his first time really getting to have a conversation with someone around his age, who hadn't spent their whole life in the facility.

Taemin opened his mouth but had no idea what to say. "I...I don't know, I'm sorry,” he paused, “Hyung what is your name?”

“Kibum,” he said, pulling his knees up towards him. "So what's it like growing up with a mom and dad?"

Taemin was unsure of what to say. It was so normal to him, like breathing, how could he possibly explain something so natural? "It's...I don't really know how-"

"Do you think they've forgotten about me?" Key asked, cutting Taemin off.

"Your parents?" Key nodded. "Kibum hyung, parents don't just forget their kids."

Kibum looked up at Taemin, his eyes starting to water. "They probably got a new baby by now," he scoffed, "probably more like two or three..and replaced me."

Taemin's heart shattered at the older boy's words. His voice was low and soft when he spoke. "They could never replace you. Moms and dads don't do that. They think about you everyday, and pray you're safe. They still hope you’ll come home to them someday."

Key sniffled into his knees. "How do you know? You've never met them."

"Because that's what moms and dads do. They haven't forgotten you. They love you and pray for you every day. I don't need to know them to know that." Taemin wondered what his own parents were doing, he hoped they were alright, he couldn’t imagine what the stress of losing a child would be like.

A muffled sob left the recliner. "I wanna go home."

Kibum wasn't even sure where home was anymore, or what it entailed. All he knew was that wherever home was, there was also a set of warm, loving arms, a pale blue skirt and dark hair that smelled like fruit. That, he knew, was better than anything else he'd experienced in the last 14 years of his life. 


	2. Chapter Two

Key fidgeted on the table, the sound of the crinkling paper beneath him the only sound in the room. Dr. Cho stood at the counter, writing notes in a folder, before turning to Key and breaking the silence, holding a thermometer in front of his mouth. "Open."

Key opened his mouth and then closed it once the thermometer was under his tongue. The doctor moved to the side so he could wrap a blood pressure cuff around the boy's arm. 

The thermometer beeped and the doctor pulled it from Key's mouth, growling angrily after reading the results. He dropped the thermometer and slapped Kibum across the face, then ripped the blood pressure cuff off his arm, throwing it across the room. "You idiot! You have a fever! Now we can't start the experiment!"

Key bowed his head. "I'm sorry sir."

Dr. Cho yanked him off the table by his wrist and shoved him towards the door. "Get out! Get out! Get out you little asshole!" He growled, pointing at the door. 

Key apologized and bowed a second time, groaning in pain as the doctor slapped his hand over Key's ear, the sound of the doctor’s hand connecting with the side of his head echoing in his skull. He quickly headed back to his apartment, his eyes trained on the floor while picking at his arm nervously.

Taemin yanked his arm out of the older man's grip. "Let me go!" He started running again, but he didn’t know where to go, the place was like a maze.

"Taemin, this is the third time you've tried in five minutes, give up." Jungsu said, looking bored as Taemin pulled at a door. Where it led to, he didn't know. But he was willing to take his chances to get away from the doctor.

"No! You're gonna do stuff to me!" He groaned and banged his fist against the locked door. He cursed under his breath and leaned his forehead against the cool steel of the door, but turned back to face the doctor as he heard him move.

"We just want to check your vitals Taemin. You're getting worked up over nothing." Jungsu spoke calmly and stepped closer to him, backing him against the door. He grabbed Taemin's arm and dragged him towards the examination rooms. 

As he was dragged down the hall, Key walked around the corner, his eyes fixed on the floor, the fingers of his right hand busily picking and scratching at the skin on his left arm, small dots of blood smeared across his skin. 

"Hyung, help me!" Taemin hollered.

Key didn't even look up, he just kept his pace and walked past. Taemin couldn’t even be sure Kibum had heard him. 

"Hyung?" Taemin whimpered as Key turned the next corner.

Jungsu laughed. It was funny Taemin thought the broken Kim boy would come to anyone’s rescue. "That little whore isn't gonna help you."

 _Whore_? Taemin frowned and then it clicked. Jungsu. He was the one who raped Key. "You! You're the one who raped him! You raped Kibum hyung!" Taemin tried to pull his arm away, kicking at Jungsu's legs. "You're evil!"

"Taemin, Taemin, rape is such an ugly word," He slid his hand down Taemin's arm to his wrist, twisting it. The teenager gasped in pain and tried even harder to pull away. "Stop it," Jungsu hissed, twisting his wrist a bit further. "Stop fighting...it can get worse than you can even imagine," he said, dragging Taemin down the hallway.

"Let me go," Taemin begged, trying to ground himself into the floor.

Jungsu turned and grabbed Taemin by the throat. "Have you by chance noticed Kibum's eyes?"

Taemin nodded slowly. The moment he’d noticed it, he knew it has to be the work of one of the doctors.

Jungsu grinned, "They're real pretty, huh?"

"What'd you do to him?" Taemin croaked, pulling and slapping at the doctor’s hands, desperate to breathe. 

Jungsu laughed. "He's blind in one eye."

Taemin's eyes widened. "The green room." He whispered.

Jungsu nodded. "Want me to take you there? I can show you how it was done." 

Taemin shook his head, fear churning in his guts. "I'll be good! I promise!"

The doctor smiled. "Smart boy," he released Taemin and allowed him to massage his neck for a few seconds before grabbing his arm and dragging him down the hallway. After turning a couple corners he shoved Taemin into an examination room. "Get on the table."

The blonde swallowed nervously and climbed onto the table, scratching nervously at the paper beneath him. There was silence in the room as Jungsu took Taemin's temperature and blood pressure. Jungsu only spoke to tell Taemin that he was going to take three vials of blood.

Taemin groaned but didn't object, only wincing as the needle pierced through his skin. After filling the three vials, Jungsu carefully pulled the needle out, pressing a cotton ball against the pinhole as he got a bandage out. After finishing Taemin's examination Jungsu took him back to the room he shared with Kibum.

Key sat at the kitchen table, his back towards the door, staring straight ahead at the refrigerator. He didn't notice Taemin or Jungsu come in. Jungsu used this opportunity to step behind him and put his mouth against the boy's ear. "How are you Kibum?"

Key jumped and fell sideways out of his chair, scooting backwards until his back hit the wall. "Please no," He whispered.

“Kibum come on,” Jungsu smiled, “I haven’t even done anything,” He stepped closer to Kibum, until Kibum was trapped between him and the wall. “Yet.” He finished, reaching out to touch Kibum. Kibum flinched when thick fingers dragged across his neck, squeezing and jerking him to his feet. 

“Now lemme see that pretty little ass,” he growled, turning Kibum around and shoving him against the wall. 

Kibum squeaked out a “no” as he thudded against the wall, crying as he felt the doctor jerking at his pants. “please don’t, please.” He begged, whimpering as the cool air hit his bare skin. 

“So so pretty,” Jungsu cooed, sliding his hands over Kibum, to cup his asscheeks in his hands for just a few seconds, before squeezing them and letting them go. “Bend for me baby,” he whispered, jerking on Kibum’s shoulders to bend him at the waist.

“”Please stop, please, please, please.” Kibum continued to beg, crying out as Jungsu harshly slapped his ass, laughing and gently running his fingers over the hot red mark that appeared.  
  
“Im gonna fuck you so good, would you like that?” He whispered callously. 

Kibum shook his head frantically, “no, no, no,” he continued to chant as Jungsu spoke again. “Ill make you cum,” he laughed. 

Taemin watched on in shock, he wanted to look away but it seemed impossible. He wanted to do something, anything to help Kibum out of this horrifying situation, but he found himself frozen in terror, unable to take his eyes off the nightmare unfolding before him.

“No?” Jungsu said, “You don’t want me to make you feel good?” He acted surprised.

“No, please don’t,” Kibum cried, his hands shaking against the wall as he tried to keep his balance. He sucked in a breath as he heard Jungsu undo the zippers on his pants, the material hitting the floor.

“I don’t know, I think a dick in your ass might do us all some good, whaddaya think Taemin?” 

Taemin’s face twisted into a scowl as the doctor included him in nis attacks against the older boy. 

Kibum sniffled again, shame filling him as he realized this was all happening in front of the new boy, his legs shaking underneath him. As he once again shook his head, whining out another desperate “no,”

“Ill tell you what,” Jungsu said, pulling Kibum towards him and pushing him to his knees. “You get my dick nice and wet, and ill fuck you real good, make you cum all over yourself, how’s that sound?” 

Kibum stared at the ground, ignoring the doctor’s hard cock just inches from his face. “Come on now,” Jungsu said, taking his dick in his hand and slapping Kibum’s cheek with it, leaving a small smear of pre cum behind. “Suck me baby boy,”

Kibum shook his head. Jungsu growled and grabbed the back of his head. It wasn’t fun anymore and he was getting mad. Playtime was over. "There's always a room ready for you in the green room, you know that."

Taemin's mouth fell open. If Key didn't comply, he would be sent to the green room, the same place he was threatened with if he was assaulted again. No matter what, they would have some stupid excuse to hurt him. It wasn't right. Nothing in the Hell they were living in was right. He watched on, horrified as Kibum sighed defeatedly, closing his eyes and silently praying that no one would find out; that the disgusting act he was about to do wouldn’t be in vain.

Something snapped inside of Taemin when he saw Kibum lick his lips and slowly open his mouth and he finally moved, running towards Jungsu and Kibum. He couldn't stand it any longer. He couldn’t let this happen. "Leave him alone!" He screamed, shoving the doctor to the floor.

Key watched wide eyed as Taemin sent his fist flying into Jungsu's face. He turned around and ran into the bathroom. He tried to lock it behind him, but his hands were too shaky, so instead he climbed intro the shower in the corner furthest from the door. As he hid, Jungsu shoved Taemin off of him. He stood above Taemin and pulled his pants up as he kicked him in the ribs. "You're really pushing your luck kid." He hissed, kicking Taemin a second time.

Taemin groaned and rolled over, and Jungsu was quick to press his foot against the boy's throat, choking him. "You're lucky I'm not in the mood for this shit." He kicked him a final time before heading towards the door. "Next time you won't get so lucky."

Taemin groaned in pain, his breathing heavy as he struggled to catch his breath, slowly pushing himself to his feet. He reached up and gently massaged his neck. A moment passed and the thumping of his heart had slowed. He turned around to see Kibum was gone. "Ki Hyung?" He walked to the bathroom and knocked on the door.

Kibum sat in the far corner of the bathtub, his arms wrapped around his knees, his head down, trying to make himself as small as possible. He looked up when he heard Taemin call his name and knock on the door. "Hyung, are you okay? He's gone."

Kibum was silent.

"Hyung?" Taemin sounded worried.

Kibum finally spoke, his voice muffled. "You're an idiot."

"What? Can..Can I come in?"

"Whatever." What he wanted had never mattered anyway. Why would it matter now?

Taemin slowly opened the door and stepped into the entryway. Key was hidden behind the orange shower curtain. "Hyung? Are you okay?" He asked again.

"You're stupid. You're gonna get yourself killed."

Taemin was silent.

"Why would you do that?" kibum genuinely couldn’t understand why someone would risk their own safety to help him. 

Taemin could hear the confusion in the older boy’s voice, and he curled his toes against the laminate floor. "He was hurting you."

"It's better than getting killed...they'll kill you." Kibum whispered matter of factly. “you know that, right? You’re replaceable to them.”

"I don't care," Taemin said, stepping closer to the shower.

"Why?" Key was baffled.

"Because..." Taemin hesitated. "Because I like you."

Key lifted his head, and chewed on his bottom lip. "You like me?" No one had ever said that to him before.

Taemin took another step forward and pulled the shower curtain open. Key turned his head away and wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand, feeling his cheeks flush in embarassment.

"Yeah, I like you." He smiled softly.

Key rolled his eyes and snorted, shaking his head. "How can you like me? It's been like, four days. You don't know me."

"I don't know," Taemin stepped into the tub, sitting down next to Key. The older boy moved to get up, but Taemin gently wrapped his fingers around Key's wrist. "I just do.." Key froze when Taemin touched him. He looked down at the younger boy's fingers wrapped around his wrist, his heart pounding so hard and fast that he was sure the blonde could hear it. Despite his fear, he allowed himself to be pulled back down to sit next to Taemin. He sighed when his wrist was released, wrapping his arms back around his knees protectively. 

"How can you like someone you don't know?" He whispered, not looking at the boy next to him.

Taemin shrugged. "I don't know."

"You don't know anything," Key scoffed.

Taemin laughed, although Kibum appeared to be serious. "Yeah, sorry about that."

There was an awkward silence and then Key began picking at his right arm again, pulling and scratching at the pale flesh, dotted with tiny scars. Taemin watched as small red droplets appeared. He frowned and pulled Kibum's hand away. "Stop it."

Key looked over at him, confused. He became even more confused as Taemin stood up and walked over to the counter, grabbing a couple small towels, wetting one under the sink and ringing it out before returning to the boy in the tub. He gently took Key's hand in his and pulled his arm out, then gently began to wash it.

Key watched, surprised as the new boy gently washed his arm, before throwing the towel down and using the dry one to pat it dry. "I..."

Taemin looked up at him. "Hmm?"

"Nevermind."


	3. Chapter Three

Key watched, looking bored as Dr. Cho put a bandaid over the area where he'd put the injection. "Go home."

Key looked surprised. "That's it?” 

"Yeah, we're done for the day."

He hopped off the bed and headed for the door. "Okay," He mumbled walking out of the room and going home, where Taemin greeted him from the recliner, as he headed towards the kitchen.

"They still won't tell me what this experiment is," Key said, pouring himself a glass of water.

"I don't know what they're gonna do with me either," Taemin said, flipping through the channels.

Key took a sip, joining Taemin in the living room, sitting cross-legged on the floor-they still hadn’t given the boys another chair. "Yeah but...I figured today they'd tell me...like 'since we're starting today we'll tell you what it is' but nothing."

Taemin turned to look at him, furrowing his brows. "What'd they do?"

Key pulled up his sleeve to show Taemin the bandaid. "An injection."

"Of what?" 

The older boy shrugged. "He didn't say. He just said that we were gonna start slow and only do one, and that it was gonna be little."

"Any ideas?"

Key shook his head and finished the water, setting the empty glass beside him. "I'm scared."

"It'll be okay." Taemin said softly, setting the tv remote to the side.

Key sighed. "You don't know that. You know, people die from experiments all the time. Who knows what they injected me with.”

"I know," Taemin said. "But I also know you're gonna be okay. You'll get out of here someday." He sounded so sure of himself, like he’d seen the future and knew it was true.

"What about you? You're coming with me." Key didn't actually believe Taemin. He stopped believing he'd ever get out when he was 14. He would occasionally be plagued sporadically with random hopefulness, but even that vanished after being sent to the green room. But he played along.

"Yeah?" Taemin smiled, he liked the idea of Kibum wanting him around even after their nightmare was over.

Key nodded. "You can teach me how to ride a bike."

"That'll be the first thing I do."

Key smiled, envious of Taemin's naivety. 

"What do you think they're going to do with me hyung?" Taemin asked suddenly. "I thought they would have done something to me by now."

"Not necessarily, I've been here for years."

"Yeah, I know," Taemin said. "But you said that that's not very common."

"It's better not to think about it. Makes it easier to sleep." Key took the tv remote off the arm of the recliner and started flipping through the channels. "Wanna watch Spongebob?" he asked, changing the subject.

Taemin sighed and nodded. "Sure, why not?"

  
The week passed, with more of the same.

  
Taemin poured himself a glass of water and walked into the living area. Key was laying on his stomach in front of the tv, watching a show in English.

Taemin sat down in the recliner.

"Hi," Key said, without looking up.

"You can understand this?" Taemin said, listening as the character spoke what sounded like nonsense to the people around him.

"Most of it," Key answered. He rolled over and sat up on his hands. "What'd they do today?"

Taemin frowned. "Same as before, you?"

Key sighed. "Another injection. But I'm scared...they asked me...they asked me how I've been feeling since they started me on the injections last week."

Taemin nodded, then realized Key never seemed to mention those kinds of things. "Well, how have you been feeling?"

"I've...well, yesterday I had cramps."

"Maybe it's just a coincidence," Taemin said, trying to reassure Key.

"Yeah, sure," He dug his fingers against the carpet. "You wanna sit by me and watch?"

Taemin smiled and stood up from the chair. "Sure."

Key rolled back over and scooted to the side, smiling as the younger boy sat down next to him, crossing his legs.

They sat in a comfortable silence for a few minutes, Taemin picking at a loose thread on his shorts as he made up his own dialogue to the show in his head.

"Hey hyung, when we get out, do you still want to be friends?"

Key looked up at him, unsure of what to say. The younger boy talked this way often, his face never losing that gleam of hope. He always played along, but he found it frustrating, wanted to tell Taemin to shut up, that it was hopeless, but Taemin seemed so sure they'd get out. The easiness of his life up until then was evident in his naivety. Slowly, Kibum nodded, deciding he’d keep playing along. "Yeah Taemin, I'd think I'd like that,” he didn't have the heart to tell him how things would really end: the only way they'd get out would be in body bags.

A loud banging against the door pulled him from his thoughts, a gruff voice calling his name. "Kibum, open this door right now!"

Taemin looked over at Key. "Who's that?"

The older boy put a finger over his closed lips, signaling that they needed to stay quiet.

"Kibum you little slut! I know you're in there!" Taemin watched as the hurt and shame washed over Key and he started picking at his arm.

"Kibum don't make me say it again!" Taemin still couldn't recognize the voice. He couldn't understand why no doctors were coming to stop him. Where were they?

Key still didn't move, he just squeezed his eyes shut, mouthing the words 'no one's here, please leave, no one's here.'

There was silence outside the door. Key opened his eyes and sighed in relief. 

"Who was that?"

"Minho."

"What does he want?"

"Me," Key said, frowning and continuing to pick at his arm.

"What? Why?"

Before Key could answer there was more banging at the door. "You blew it whore. I can hear you in there with your little girlfriend."

"Fuck," Key mumbled, panicking as he heard beeps and clicks coming from the other side of the door. "Taemin, get up," He said, standing up and grabbing the younger boy's arm, pulling him to his feet. He swore again as the door opened and Minho came in, heading straight for Kibum. 

Key dragged Taemin towards the bathroom, shoving him into it, gasping as Minho grabbed his arm.

"Stay in the bathroom and lock the door!" He screeched, trying to get away from Minho, as he saw Taemin coming back out to help.

"But-"

"Do it!" Key yelled, still fighting Minho as the larger boy dragged him out the door.


	4. Chapter Four

  
  
Minho shoved Key through the door and Key looked around, shocked. He'd heard things about the living conditions of the people in the basement, but he hadn't thought it was true. Who would believe that people were kept like dogs, treated like animals?

  
Minho dragged Key through the room, large kennels on both sides of them. Each kennel had a blanket, pillow, toilet and bowl of water inside it. At the opposite end of the room stood a row of showers, and a few shelves full of towels and clothes.

  
The people-both men and women- hollered at Key. He heard a few of them ask Minho 'to share.' Minho ignored them and dragged Key to an empty kennel, then shoved him inside. He followed close and latched the door behind him.

  
"Why?" Key asked. He knew what Minho was; what had been done to him, what had been done to the other people kept in the kennels that filled the room. They weren't even people anymore, just bodies-the only thing left was animal instincts: fucking, fighting and feeding. But Key didn't know why Minho would want him, why he'd be willing to deal with someone who was going to put up a fight, when there were a plenty of people who'd give it to him willingly. He'd heard stories about Minho, sure, but he hadn't really believed them. 

Minho scoffed and grabbed Key by his throat, forcing him to the ground. "Why do you think?"

  
"I dunno, that's why I asked moron." He gagged when Minho's grip tightened around his throat.

  
"I'll be damned if Jungsu gets a piece of you and I don't," he hissed, shoving Key on his back and yanking his shorts and boxers down his legs.

  
Key gasped as the cool concrete floor made contact with his skin, and Minho pulled his own pants and underwear to his ankles. He tightened his grip around Key's neck as the boy slapped and scratched at him, flailing his legs in an effort to get away. He gagged again and started clawing at Minho's hands instead as it became harder to breath.

  
The bigger boy slapped Key's hands away and pinned them above his head. "had to listen to him brag about fucking your tight little ass for so long, how no matter how many times he fucked you, you were always as tight as a virgin. How pretty you looked when you cried.” Kibum couldn’t help but be shocked, finding out that Jungsu bragged about his rapes, said such filthy things about him to other people. It made him feel so dirty.

  
“but it’s my turn now,” Minho hissed, “now scream nice and pretty for everyone," he slammed into Key, earning a loud scream from the smaller boy.

  
He tried to pull his hands free, but Minho easily overpowered him and continued to fuck him, moving faster as Key's blood eased the slide, ignoring Kibum’s pleas for him to stop.

  
The occupants of the other kennels strained their necks to get a good view, their hands sliding into their pants, some removing their pants completely, feeling no shame as their naked bodies were exposed to everyone.

  
Key cried out again, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to separate himself from the situation. He tried to imagine himself someplace nice, but a particularly hard thrust and Minho's teeth digging into his neck made it impossible.

  
His eyes snapped open when a booming voice called Minho's name. Dr. Cho. He wasn't sure if he was happy or sad he'd showed up. Dr. Cho would stop it, but, he also might send Key to the green room. Minho stopped and looked up to see who called his name, then continued, his hips jerking harder and faster as Kibums’s fingers scrabbled at the concrete beneath him.

  
"MINHO!" Dr. Cho unlocked the kennel and went in, pulling him off the smaller boy, and threw him against the bars of the kennel. 

  
Key scooted backwards, pulling up his boxers and shorts, and bowed his head at Dr. Cho. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please forgive me Dr. Cho, I'm sorry."

  
Dr. Cho scoffed and took a phone out of his pocket. He hit a few buttons and held it to his ear. "Yes. C. Minho...ID number 9502, yes, level one. He needs to be sent to the green room. Yes, okay, thank you." He grabbed Key and dragged him out of the kennel, double locking the door behind them.

  
He dragged Key down the hall, screaming 'shut up' to the people who hollered profanities at Key, asking to taste him and touch him, as they reached out towards him through the bars of their cages.

  
"Sometimes I think you're more trouble than you're worth." He muttered.

  
"I'm sorry sir," Key said, keeping his eyes focused on the ground as the middle aged man dragged him into the elevator. He shoved him against the wall and hit the buttons on the panel, then turned to Key, pointing a finger at him. "You deserve to go to the green room for this shit, but seeing the money that's been spent, it'd be a waste if you didn't survive. But this is the last chance you're getting, got it?"

  
Key got on his hands and knees and bowed his head. "Yes sir. Thank you."

  
The elevator door opened and Cho grabbed Key's arm, pulling him to his feet and dragging him down the hallway. "Do you have any of those antibiotics left?"

  
Key nodded.

  
"Good. Take them. One a day. Understood?"

  
"Yes sir."

  
Dr. Cho hit the buttons on the panel and when the door opened, he shoved Key into the room. "Rest, you've got an appointment in the morning."

  
"Yes sir."

  
He walked into the room, hearing the familiar 'click-click-beep' as the door shut behind him. Taemin stood up from the recliner and ran up to Key, wrapping his arms around him. Key froze in surprise, but didn't pull away from the younger boy. "Hyung, are you okay? What happened!?"

  
"Dr. Cho came, it's okay," Key said, gently pulling away and climbing into bed. Taemin followed him, sitting down on the edge of the mattress.

  
"What about that Minho guy?" Taemin asked, frowning.

  
"He's going to the green room," Key answered, pulling the blanket over his shoulders, shame filling him as Minho's words echoed in his head. Jungsu told other people about what they did together, what Jungsu made him do. everyone must think he's a slut.

  
Taemin sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. "Are you really okay?"

  
"It's nothing I can't handle Tae, don't worry. I'm gonna rest now, okay?" Kibum rolled over, his back towards Taemin, and pushed himself into the corner.

  
"Alright," Taemin said slowly. “I guess I’ll…have lunch or something,” he said to himself, before walking into the kitchen to find himself some food, all the while wondering what happened to Key in the basement, and how much he really could handle


	5. Chapter Five

  
"He's passed out three times in the last week! Tell me what you're doing to him!" Taemin said, exasperated, as Jungsu took another vial of blood.

  
"It's normal, don't worry, just make sure he doesn't get hurt," the doctor said, putting a bandaid on Taemin's arm.

  
"Passing out isn't normal!" Taemin snapped.

  
"It's just syncope, don't worry." Jungsu insisted, already beyond annoyed with Taemin and his worried rambling about Kibum.

  
Taemin groaned. "But-"

  
"Just shut up and do what you're told!" Jungsu hissed. "Now get out and go home." 

Taemin hopped off the table, grumbling under his breath, and headed back to his room.

  
  
"I've been a little...itchy." Key said softly, glancing down at his hands as Dr. Cho wrote notes in his folder.  
"Itchy in general or in a particular area?" Cho asked, looking up from his notes.

  
Key's cheeks heated up, and he kept his head down, embarassment flooding him as he spoke. "Uhh, down...uh, down there."

  
Dr. Cho nodded, his pen scratching across the page of his clipboard as he wrote, "That's a normal side effect."

  
"Of what?"

  
"The injections of course." The doctor smiled condescendingly.

  
"What are the injections?" Kibum tried.

  
"Don't worry, it'll be fine. Now, is there anything else I need to know about?"

  
"I'm sweating more than usual." 

  
Cho nodded. "Any constipation or diarrhea, excessive gas?"

  
Key shook his head. "No,"

  
The doctor nodded again, adding a few more notes to his file. "All right, we're done for today. Go home."

  
Key hopped off the bed and left the room. He walked into the house to find it empty. Heading towards the bathroom, he heard the shower running, so he sat down in the recliner instead. He didn't turn the tv on, or pick up a book, instead he chose to sit quietly and think. Usually, he avoided thinking too much, because it would just depress, worry or scare him, but lately, he couldn't seem to get the younger boy out of his head.  
He liked Taemin. He was nice to talk to, and he found it was easier to sleep when there was a warm body next to him. He liked it when Taemin cuddled against him and wrapped his arms around his waist. Some nights, he wanted to wrap his arms around the blonde, and pull him against his chest, but he was too scared.

  
"You okay?"  
Key was brought back to Earth by Taemin's voice. He looked up to see him standing in front of him, a fresh shirt and pair of shorts covering his still damp body.

  
"Yeah, I was just thinking."

  
"About what?"

  
Key shook his head. "Nothing, it was nothing."

  
Taemin nodded, his lips turning up into a smile. "Uh-huh. That's why you had a big dorky smile on your face."

  
Key felt his cheeks heat up. "Quiet."

  
The younger boy laughed and grabbed the remote control, then flopped onto the small couch that had been brought in the previous day. "What do you wanna watch?" Key shrugged. "Spongebob?"

  
"You have the remote, you pick," Key said.

  
Taemin flipped through the channels, stopping on Spongebob Squarepants, knowing how much Kibum liked it, and setting the remote on the floor, looking over and admiring the smile that adorned the older boy's face. He liked making Key smile. He had such a pretty smile, and really cute dimples.

Key looked over and caught him staring. "What?"

  
"Nothing," Taemin said, shaking his head and blushing lightly at getting caught.

  
They sat in silence for a while, enjoying the cartoon. Out of the corner of his eye, Taemin could see Key fidgeting, occasionally rubbing his eyes until finally, halfway through the second episode, Key groaned. "I can't take it anymore."

  
"What's wrong?"

  
"This stupid headache." He sighed and stood up, heading for the kitchen. He didn't make it, instead wobbling and attempting to grab a chair, but falling to the floor. Taemin jumped up and ran over to him.

"Key!?"

  
The older boy groaned and opened his eyes. "I'm okay."

  
"You're bleeding. Here, let me help you." He said, carefully pulling Key to his feet and leading him to the bathroom. "Are you sure you're okay?" He asked as he sat Key on the toilet lid and then wet a washcloth.

  
"I'm fine, really," he insisted as Taemin cleaned the blood off his forehead.

  
"It's not bad," Taemin said absentmindedly, taking a bandaid out of the medicine cabinet and putting it on the cut.

  
"Thanks," Key said, glancing up at Taemin.

  
"Yeah no problem."

  
Key felt like he was on a tv show, the way Taemin was looking down at him. Taemin wanted to kiss him, but thought he shouldn't. They sat in an awkward silence for a few seconds until Taemin caved and leaned down, and cupped Kibum's face in his hands, then kissed him. He felt Key's body tense up, but a second later, he felt him smile.

  
The kiss was short and sweet, no tongue, just the sweet press of their lips together. When he pulled away, Key was blushing. Taemin smiled nervously. It wasn't his first kiss by any means, but he was still shy and unsure when it came to Kibum.

  
Key felt butterflies in his stomach, and he couldn't get the smile off his face. When Taemin had kissed him, for just that moment, he had felt true happiness. Something he thought he would never feel again. But now he knew it was possible.

  
"Uhm, I'm sorry," Taemin said, "I just uhm, I really like you."

  
Key's blush deepened. "I...I like you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the long wait and the boring chapter. ive been pretty distracted. ill try to get the next chapter up a lot sooner. hopefully you enjoyed the cuteness though.


	6. Chapter Six

Taemin watched curiously as Jungsu prepared a syringe on the opposite side of the room. His eyes never left the syringe as the doctor pulled the plunger back, and the tube slowly filled with a dirty blue colored liquid. Jungsu sat the syringe on a small steel tray next to some other things and brought it to the examination table. "Arm out."

  
"What is that?"

  
"Don't worry about it. Now arm out."

  
"No."

I wasn't giving you a choice." Junsu hissed, grabbing Taemin's arm and pulling it out. He took an alcohol wipe and swiped it over the crook of Taemin's elbow, then tied a tourniquet around his arm and felt around, feeling for a vein. Once he found one he smiled and picked up the syringe.

  
Taemin tried desperately to pull his arm away. He didn't want that muddy blue liquid inside him. Jungsu tightened his grip on the smaller man's arm, reminded Taemin of the green room and smiled as he stilled long enough for him to inject the fluid.

  
Taemin watched on, horrified, as Jungsu slowly pushed the plunger down, and the grimy blue solution made it's way through the tube and disappeared into Taemin's arm-directly into his blood stream. Jungsu pulled the syringe away and put a bandaid in it's place, then took the tourniquet off. "Okay, go home."

  
Taemin hopped off the bed and left the room, heading down the corridor towards his home. As he turned the corner he remembered the first time he'd been dragged down the hall. He found it hard to believe that it had only been six weeks ago, it felt like a lifetime. He sighed sadly to himself as he thought about his family. He wondered what they were doing, if they'd given up on finding him yet. He felt tears form in the corners of his eyes and forced himself to stop thinking about it. It wouldn’t do him any good now.

  
He got back to the room and headed towards the bathroom, not noticing that although the tv was on, there was no one watching it. He was about to open the door when he heard crying, muffled by the door. "Key?"

  
Key panicked. He was finally going to get caught. He'd been sick the last few days in a row, but had managed to keep it hidden from the younger boy. "Go away."

  
"Are you sick?"

  
He heard Key take a deep breath and then cough. "I'm fine."

  
"Do you want me to come in and rub your back, bring you some water or something?"

  
Key made a whining sound, his cheeks heating up. "It's not that kind of sick! Go away." He sighed, feeling embarrassed as he reached over towards the sink to re-wet his washcloth in the cold water, then put it back on the back of his neck.

  
Taemin frowned and went to the living room, flopping down on the new couch that had been brought in, and grabbed the book he'd been reading before his meeting with the doctor. He looked up when, a few minutes later, Kibum came out of the bathroom. "Are you okay? He asked, after Key sat down in the recliner.

  
Key nodded, and leaned back, closing his eyes.

  
"Do you need anything?" Taemin asked, watching a bead of sweat roll down Key's flushed face.

  
"I'm so thirsty, could you get me something to drink?" Taemin nodded and stood up, taking long strides to the kitchen, returning moments later to hand Key a cold glass of water.

"Thank you," Key said, raising the glass to his lips and gulping it down in seconds. He handed the glass back to Taemin.

"More?" Taemin nodded again and brought him more.

  
After his fourth glass of water, Key sighed and set the empty cup on the table. "Thanks a lot." He leaned back again.

  
Taemin nodded. "No problem. Is there anything else I can get you?"

  
Key shook his head. "No, I'm good, thanks." A moment later he looked up at Taemin. "Anything new today?"

  
"Actually, yeah, there is."

  
Key looked interested. "What happened?"

  
"He gave me an injection. It looked like dirty blue water except it seemed thicker, like a gel or something."

  
"They wouldn't tell you what it was would they?"

  
"No, and he injected it directly into my blood stream...Key....I don't wanna die."

  
Key stood up and walked over to Taemin. Nervously, he wrapped his arms loosely around Taemin's waist. "You're not gonna die." Taemin wrapped his arms around Key, burying his face in the crook of the older boy's neck, relishing in the feel of Key's arms around him.  
  
~~  
Taemin smiled as he felt Key's fingers search for his in the dark. He snuggled closer to the other boy, gently squeezing his fingers. "Taemin?" Key's soft voice broke the silence.

  
"Hmm?"

  
"Are you..." Key fidgeted a little, his grip on Taemin's fingers tightening and then loosening, over and over. "Are you my boyfriend now?"

  
Taemin smiled in the darkness, knowing that romantic relationships were another one of those things he knew about and understood only through books and tv. "Do you want me to be your boyfriend?"

  
"Yeah..."

  
"Okay then," He leaned up and kissed Key's cheek. "We're boyfriends."

  
The older boy turned on his side, pulling Taemin to him, his chest flush with the younger boy's back. If Taemin was his boyfriend, he had no reason to be scared of pulling him closer.

  
"You never did this before."

  
"I wanted to," Key admitted, shoving his nose against Taemin's neck.

  
"Well then why didn't you?"

  
Key hesitated. "I was scared."

  
The younger boy wiggled out of his grip and turned to face him. "Scared?"

  
"Yeah."

  
"Why?"

  
"I was afraid you'd get mad or wouldn't like me too."

  
Taemin pressed his lips against Key's, smiling as Key wrapped his arms around his waist, surprised when he felt Key moan softly against his mouth-hed barely done anything. He pushed Key onto his back and crawled on top of him, pulling away to kiss down Key's neck, sucking on a collarbone, making Kibum moan again, louder this time,and jerk his hips up a tiny bit. Key didn't know what to do with his hands...he wrapped them around Taemin's waist, sliding them down. They brushed over Taemin's ass, before he jerked them away, resting them on Taemin's hips.

  
Key felt himself panic. He made a mistake, he shouldn't of thrusted his hips like that, moaned like that, he shouldn't of touched him like that. Now it was gonna go further than he intended it to. But he knew it was his fault, so he allowed Taemin to slide his hands over his chest, gasping as the blonde grinded against him.

  
Taemin wasn't a virgin. He'd had sex before, with boys and girls, as a top and a bottom. He doubted Key had ever had consensual sex, so he wasn't sure if he was moving too fast, however, Key encouraged him by rocking his hips up to meet his, and threading his fingers in his hair. Key couldn't fathom the pleasure he was feeling, yet he only rocked up into Taemin's hips and encouraged him further because he felt like he had to. In Key's warped mind, thrusting and moaning and touching had been a sign to go further. It wouldn't be fair to stop now. It would leave Taemin frustrated and angry, and it would be all his fault. Everything was his fault, he knew that. He'd known it for years.

  
He grew weary when he felt Taemin lift the bottom of his t-shirt, but he allowed the younger boy to pull it over his head, grateful for the darkness that engulfed them, and then connected their lips again. He helped Taemin out of his shorts and then shimmied out of his own, hoping that his lack of excitement and nervousness was well hidden. But it wasn't.

  
"Key, are you okay?"

  
Key swallowed harshly and nodded. "We can do it if you want."

  
Taemin shook his head. "No, no, let's just go to bed."

  
"Well, if you want to we-"

  
"No, Key, this isn't about me, it's about you." He pulled Key against his chest and kissed his forehead. "Let's just go to sleep, okay?"

  
Key nodded, inwardly glad that Taemin had said something. "Okay." He snuggled closer to Taemin. "Goodnight."

  
"Goodnight Key."


	7. Chapter Seven

The first thing Taemin saw when he opened his eyes was Key's face. His lips were softly curved up into a gentle smile, but his skin was pale and clammy. He pushed himself up into a sitting position and wiped the sleep from the corners of his eyes, then looked Key over closer. Small tremors wracked his body and his breathing was labored.

  
Taemin frowned and carefully climbed out of bed, trying not to wake the older boy. He stood up and headed towards the bathroom, stopping when he heard Kibum whisper his name. He turned around to see him staring at him.

  
"Hmm?"

  
"Don't leave me," He said softly, another tremor shaking through him.

  
"I'm not leaving you, I just have to go to the bathroom."

  
Key nodded and Taemin went to the bathroom as quickly as he could, hurrying back to Key, who hadn't moved, but smiled when he saw him. Taemin slipped back under the covers and wrapped his arms around Key, frowning as he could feel Key's body shake. "Are you okay?" He felt the older boy shrug.

  
"Maybe I'm dying."

  
Taemin kissed the top of his head. "You're not dying."

  
"But-"

  
"No Kibum. You're not dying."

  
Key was silent.

  
"I think you should go back to sleep, maybe you'll feel better," Taemin said after a moment, running his fingers through Key's hair.

  
Kibum shifted in the bed, resting his head on the blonde's chest, then sighed. "Don't leave me, okay?"

  
Taemin squeezed him a little tighter. "I'll never leave you."

  
When Taemin woke up, he saw Key sitting up next to him, reading a book. "Are you feeling better?"

  
Key looked over at him, smiled, and nodded, then tossed his book on the floor. "I sort of um, wanted to talk to you?"

  
Taemin sat up in the bed, his mind racing with what Key could want to discuss. In his experience, someone wanting to 'talk to you', was never a good thing. "Yeah, sure, what's up?"

  
Key picked at his arm. "I uh, I love you Taemin. I never had a friend until I met you."

  
The younger boy smiled at Key's words, wondering why Key seemed so nervous about something like that. "I love you too Key. Being with you makes all this bearable."

  
It was Key's turn to smile. "You know...last night..."

  
"Sorry" Taemin said, "If I rushed things a little."

  
Key shook his head. "I...I want to be with you, I just..." he frowned and trailed off.

  
"Hmm?"

  
Key furrowed his eyebrows, unsure of how to tell Taemin that he didn't like the idea of having sex with him being on top of him, that he felt trapped and powerless. How terrified he was of having someone being inside of him again. How it made him think of Jungsu or Minho on top of him, taking what they wanted, not caring how much it hurt him. He knew Taemin wouldn't hurt him, but he couldn't help but think of how helpless and scared he felt. "I don't like..." he bit his lip. "Never mind, you'll get mad."

  
"No babe, you can tell me. What is it you don't like?"

  
"When we were...gonna do it...and you were on top of me," Key looked away, and his voice was soft, low, and Taemin had to strain to hear it. "It made me think of things..I can't get away."

  
Taemin stared at Key, confused, not really understanding what he meant. "Key...I don't understand."

  
He picked at his arm harder, pinching deeper. "I'm...I'm trapped." He frowned when Taemin pulled his arm away, keeping him from picking at his other arm.

  
It clicked in Taemin's head then. Kissing had been one thing, but apparently as soon as sex entered the picture, being underneath someone was scary. He couldn't quite understand it himself, but he knew Key had been abused and manipulated on more than one level, so he didn't question him, instead he accepted the fact that being underneath someone had the potential to remind Key of the times he hadn't been given a choice. "I'm sorry Key."

  
Key looked over at him, surprised. "You're not mad?"

  
"No, of course not! I love you. I don't want you to be scared or uncomfortable, especially when it comes to sex."

  
"So...if we switch...would that be okay?"

  
Taemin nodded enthusiastically. "Of course it's okay!"

  
Key smiled, happy that Taemin wasn't angry with him. He wasn't lying when he told the younger boy he wanted to be with him, but the previous night, he had just gotten too caught up, and then scared, and things started to happen too fast, before he got to talk to Taemin about things. He just wanted to feel more in control of the situation, not like he was trapped.  


  
  
That night they lay in bed together, Taemin weaving his fingers through Key's hair as the older boy's lips clumsily slid down his neck while a hand slid over his chest. Despite how heated their makeout session was getting, Kibum hadn't really made a move to take it any further. Taemin desperately wanted to make a move, but didn't, respecting Key's desire for control.

  
Key however, did want to take it further, but his shyness, fear and paranoia were overwhelming him. What if he was bad and couldn't make Taemin feel good? What if he wasn't enough for Taemin? What if he did something the other boy didn't like? The list of 'what if's went on and on in his mind.

  
He groaned when he felt Taemin's mouth against his ear, nibbling and sucking the lobe. He rocked his hips, rubbing his pelvis against Taemin's. "Taemin...can we..."

  
"What?" He asked, pressing another kiss against the side of his mouth.

  
"Can we make love?" Key whispered into his mouth.

  
Taemin smiled. "Are you sure you're ready?"

  
Key nodded shyly, playing with the elastic of Taemin's pajama bottoms, pulling his hands back when Taemin began pulling them down, taking his boxers with. In the soft light of the lamp he could see a flush appear across Key's cheeks, and he leaned up for another kiss. "Don't be scared okay? As long as this is what you really want, it'll be fine."

  
"What if I'm bad?"

  
"Suck," he said, holding three fingers in front of Kibum's mouth.

  
Kibum closed his lips around Taemin's fingers, slowly swirling his tongue around them as it clicked in his head what he was doing and why. He hadn't actually thought about the mechanics of it that much. He watched as Taemin pulled them away, leaned back and spread his legs, bending his knees.

  
Taemin, deciding he was going to put a show on for Kibum, locked eyes with him and pushed the first finger inside of himself, sliding it in and out. After a moment, he pushed in another finger, moaning as he began to slowly ride his fingers.

  
Key found himself pulling his clothes off as Taemin added a third finger, drawing out Kibum's name in a long moan as he bounced on his fingers. He smirked at Key, and then pulled his fingers away, only to crawl between Kibum's legs. Key blushed as Taemin looked from his cock, to his face. "If you don't like it or change your mind tell me okay?"

  
"Okay," Key agreed, nodding, watching wide eyed as the blonde wrapped his lips around his cock. "Oh my god," he let his head fall back and stuttered Taemin's name as he felt his tongue twirl around his dick.

  
After Taemin felt that Key's cock was wet enough, he pulled away, then leaned up to press his lips to Key's. He pulled away and looked at Key's face. He was biting his lip and his eyebrows were furrowed. He looked unsure. "Do you still want to? We don't have to if you don't want too."

  
"Yeah."

  
"Then make love to me," Taemin said, taking Key's cock in his hand and guiding it towards his hole.  
Key pushed in slowly, groaning as he felt Taemin clamp around him.

"Oh my god...Taemin."

  
"Don't stop Key," Taemin whispered, urging him to continue. He moaned as Key pushed in the rest of the way, the stretch burning a bit, but the pleasure of being filled taking precedence.

  
Key pulled out almost all the way and slowly took an experimental thrust back in, moaning at the tight head that surrounded him. "Taemin ohmygod you feel so good," He leaned down and kissed him, thrusting faster, as he began to find a rhythm.

  
The younger boy shifted just a bit. "Harder Key, I won't break."

  
Key obliged him and Taemin bit back a scream as the older boy rammed into his prostate. "Ohhh fuck," he slid his hand down to his cock and jerked it roughly, out of time with Key's thrusts. Key's eyes fell shut as the pleasure he felt continued to increase past levels he never imagined existed. He thrusted faster and harder, his fears and worries long forgotten.

  
Taemin writhed under him, hips rocking as he tried to impale himself deeper on Key, moaning lowly as he felt himself getting close. "Please don't stop Kibum, please." Key could only groan his name in reply. The younger boy slid his free hand down his chest to twist and pull at a nipple, tilting his head to his side and humming as Key's lips attached themselves to his neck, moaning as the older boy sucked.

  
Key stopped ravishing his neck and just moaned, his hips jerking frantically when he felt Taemin tighten around him.

  
"Oh fuckkkk," Taemin gasped, pumping his cock hard and fast as he came. His head fell back and he ran his fingers through his hair, smirking as he listened to the whimpers spill out of Key's mouth as he thrusted fast and hard as he felt his orgasm hit him.

  
He fell against Taemin and softly kissed his neck. "I...I love you Taemin."

  
Taemin nodded, wrapping his arms around Key. "I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that was shit.
> 
> sorry for the wait. i kinda got distracted and forgot for a while, and my mental health has been garbage. so i posted 2 chapters for you guys.

**Author's Note:**

> please let me know what you think! even if you've left a comment on the original version, please dont hesitate to leave a new one if you'd like. i love seeing them. thanks for reading.
> 
> Also, i do this all on mobile so i hope the font isnt too big or too small. no matter what i adjust it to on my word document, once i copy it over, it shows the same small size.


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